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Chuck Schumer Celebrates Memorial Day Alone As All Of Last Year's Guests Dead From E. Coli
1+ hour, 10+ min ago (36+ words) WASHINGTON, D. C. " Senator Chuck Schumer reportedly spent Memorial Day alone with his thoughts after having killed all of his backyard barbecue guests the previous year by serving them raw hamburger beef infected with E. coli....
Boaz Carefully Arranges Stalks Of Grain On Ground To Spell Out "Hey Gurl
1+ hour, 39+ min ago (34+ words) BETHLEHEM " As Ruth was about to come pick up extra crops left for her in the fields, workers reportedly spotted Boaz carefully arranging stalks of grain on the ground to spell out "Hey Gurl."...
Total Chaos As White Church Choir Tries To Sing African Spiritual
23+ hour, 27+ min ago (168+ words) FRISCO, TX - Chaos descended on Christ Methodist of Frisco as the all-white choir attempted to sing an African spiritual. The choir tried to start clapping near the outset, but was immediately defeated by the syncopated rhythm and the scene quickly…...
The Babylon Bee Has Obtained A Leaked Copy Of The Iran-U. S. Peace Deal
1+ day, 3+ hour ago (243+ words) News broke this morning that the United States and Iran have agreed to the framework of a peace deal, and our investigative team here at The Babylon Bee has managed to secure a leaked copy. Here, presented for the first…...
Media To Just Start Reporting When Trump Wasn't Shot At
1+ day, 5+ hour ago (158+ words) U. S. " After yet another failed assassination attempt against President Trump yesterday, the national media has agreed to just start reporting when Trump wasn't shot at. Journalists have become fatigued with repeatedly reporting the same story over and over, believing that it's…...
Church Hack: Explain To Everyone Stacking Chairs That You'd Love To Help, But Your Spiritual Gift Is Encouragement
2+ day, 23+ hour ago (32+ words) Getting a little tired of youth pastors teaching the Parable of the Talents and then asking you to go stack some chairs? Consider telling everyone you have the spiritual gift of encouragement....
'Throw Pillows' Narrowly Edges 'Food' In Local Couple's Monthly Budget
3+ day, 1+ hour ago (254+ words) DES MOINES, IA " After a tense end-of-month budgeting session, local couple Derek and Amanda Hollister confirmed on Friday that "throw pillows" had once again narrowly edged out "food" as the family's largest monthly expense. According to sources inside the home,…...
Trump Surprises Don Jr. With Beautiful Wedding Gift Of Cuba
3+ day, 4+ hour ago (28+ words) WASHINGTON, D. C. " President Donald Trump confirmed on Friday that, instead of attending his son's wedding in the Bahamas, he had a very special surprise for him: Cuba....
DNC 2024 Election Autopsy Just Joe Biden's Actual Autopsy
3+ day, 4+ hour ago (530+ words) U. S. " The Democratic National Committee released its autopsy this week of what went wrong in the 2024 election cycle, the contents of which turned out to just be the results of an autopsy performed on former President Joe Biden. DNC 2024 Election Autopsy…...
Hunter Biden's Reputation In Ruins After Talking To Candace Owens
4+ day, 49+ min ago (207+ words) U. S. " After sitting down for an interview with podcaster Candace Owens, Hunter Biden's reputation was reportedly in ruins. Former President Joe Biden's son " best known for multiple run-ins with the law stemming from drugs and other charges, allegations of influence-peddling in…...
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